Adapting

Whine whine, bitch bitch. I'm trying not to, I swear.

Right now, I can't picture myself living here for four years. But that's now. Who knows what I'll think in a few days, a few weeks. It's tough, but I'm hanging in here.

I am convinced my hallmates think I'm lame...which I do not deny, but I'm AWESOME too, damn it! I don't cuss as much anymore, I'm holding back on partying, and I stay home all day studying... but that don't mean I'm LAME! haha. It means I'm adjusting!

I should be ashamed at how many times I've used the word "I" in the past few sentences, but this is a personal blog, so I think I'm justified. haha.

I hope I'm just being paranoid that my hallmates hate me. ): I swear I've been getting some hairy eyeballs.

The people here, as a whole, are rather wealthy. (I'm being polite.) You have no idea how many iPhone 4s I've seen since coming here. It seems that everyone and their momma has one. The other day, a girl was wearing a real Rolex. Dayum. Anyways, hoping to get adjusted soon. Will update regularly.

Starting Out at JHU

It's official. Tomorrow, I am thrust from the cocoon of safety that was high school and emerge a full-fledged college student. The thought still sends shivers down my spine. Scarier still is the fact that my schedule still has not been finalized. For shame! I haven't purchased any textbooks and still am not completely sure where my classes are located. Apparently, I will metamorphose into a crippled butterfly.

I won't deny that moving in and going to orientation events in the past few days has been somewhat difficult. There was an epically tearful farewell between my parents and me. My sister just stood on the side and laughed...while taking pictures. I actually cried myself to sleep the first night in the dorms even though I knew I would see my parents the next day. Luckily, my roommate was out partying. The whole day spent at Inner Harbor was one of secretly tearing up and trying to inconspicuously hide the evidence before my family turned around. Who wouldathunk I was so sensitive?

I thought I would be the life of the party here at college. In fact, I am a nun. During orientation week, frats and sororities throw parties everyday to attract freshmen pledges. I turned down four invitations to go. My roommate must think I'm such a Debbie Downer. The truth is, I can still hear my Daddy's last words to me. "Abby, find a good church and grow in Christ." (Roughly translated) Lately, I've been thinking a lot about finding a strong fellowship that I can commit to and grow in for the next four years. Now that I've been placed so far from home, what better time is there to rely on God for support, comfort, and teachings? Either that or I really am turning into an old hag. Sleeping at 11 PM during the summer? FOR SHAME.

I still have attacks of nostalgia every once in a while. Sometimes I turn over in the bed with sheets that are too rough to be mine to look at the wall, barren of Lord of the Rings posters, and I feel inexplicably sad. When I walk around campus and I realize that the brick backdrop that had once charmed me would become my "home" for the next four years, I literally feel my heart wrench. I know I sound totally melodramatic and emo right now so I really got to change the mood of this. (I'm going to make myself cry.) When I think of all the free samples at Costco that I'm missing out on, I AM MUCH AGGRIEVED. When I think about how there is no authentic pho or Mexican food around here, I FEEL DOWNRIGHT SUICIDAL. Hopefully, one day I can find all the good fooding places around here and learn to love Baltimore.

The people here are so nice. It's to be expected amongst the freshmen because we are all fresh-eyed, equally isolated, and eager to start new relationships and social networks. Surprisingly, the upperclassmen, the professors, and even complete strangers are quick to give you a polite nod or even a friendly "hey there". Atmosphere-wise, I love this place. I went to church today with Priscilla and her Peabody friend, Coco. I walked to a complete stranger's house to carpool over to Peabody and later to a church 30-minutes away. Then later I find out that the stranger isn't even Christian! He just takes his girlfriend to church every Sunday. Even at church, complete strangers introduced themselves to us, friended us on Facebook, and offered to take us out and show us around. I really feel that God is working in my life, placing people in my path to support me in preparation for the future where one day I can help others.

On a side-note, today I tried to put my earrings back in and discovered that the back had semi-closed up. After much poking, prodding, and praying, I finally got the needle through. Now my ears hurt. I hope they don't get infected.

I finally had to whip out my (only set of) semi-formal attire. When I go back home for Christmas Vacation, I really have to go shopping for some business-casual shoes and clothes. I wore Nikes and jeans with my Banana top. For shame. hahaha. At the convocation, we got a glimpse of our future professors, as well as the Deans and Associate Deans of each school. They seem like such down-to-Earth and downright friendly people. I can't wait for school to start so I can start getting to know my professors. I really hope to find mentors and sources of inspiration here at Hopkins.

Still missing my family like crazy, but I know that after tomorrow, everything will be all right. Praise Jesus. :D

Aberfeldy - Love Is An Arrow

"Love is a thing that I can't describe

It sounds so foolish if I even try

Love is an arrow and it points at you

It tells you what you gotta do

Love is a verb and a noun as well

You find it in a dictionary under 'L'

To give you a description to spell it out

But they don't say what it's all about

Love is a fire that you can't control

It burns in the middle and it leaves a hole

You can fill it up and you don't know when

It's gonna start to burn again

Love is a good way to lose a friend

It's a two-faced liar that you can't defend

Love is a virus that invades your heart

It starts to take it all apart

Love is a shape that you can't define

With an odd set of angles and uneven sides

your head's that paper and your hearts the pen

Gonna do this sum again

Gonna do this sum again

Gonna do this sum again

Do this sum again

Love is a verb and a noun as well

You find it in the dictionary under 'L'

Love is an arrow and it points at me

It tells me how it's gonna be

It tells me how it's gonna be

It tells me how it's gonna be

It tells me how it's gonna be"

Epic Dream

I just had the most epic dream ever so I just had to wake up and write it down...even though it is 5:17 AM in Taiwan right now.


First, I was at school, looking for a place to hide from a female gunman. (Or a...gunwoman?) It wasn't really Independence, but a combination of Indy, Irvington, and those indoor schools you see on TV. I ended up hiding in a bathroom where I found Victor Liao, Wendy, Samantha, and Kimberly. While in the bathroom, we began debating the merits of standing and squatting toilets. I remember being terrified yet strangely offended that there were no sitting toilets in that bathroom.Later, the gunwoman was taken away by the security guard because there was a rule that said "No pets on campus" and, apparently, she had brought a dog. O.o

I ended up chilling with Mr. Sprague, who for some reason, fed me chicken tenders and french fries. I texted Kim to tell her to come over and get some, but she responded "Hell no, that room always smells like B.O." Which, now that I'm awake, seems more like commentary on Ms. Johnson's room. Mr. Sprague's room always smelled like microwave-able Italian food.

Then, the dream got even more complicated. Which is amazing, considering how strange it already was. At this point, the dream switches into third-person POV.

Sookie and Bill are sitting at my neighbor's house when a car pulls up. Sookie runs up to the car to get in, looks back at Bill, only to find his face covered in his maker's blood. She's furious, pulls off her shirt, and yells at him in her bra about how she is just a modern-day replacement for his maker. (This sentence makes more sense when I elaborate and say that Bill's maker was also clad only in a bra.) Bill begs Sookie not to cheapen herself and gets her back into her shirt. He then proposes. Sookie forgives him, they jump into the car, and take off for an undisclosed location.

They end up at some random park, with Tara and Lafayette in attendance. Tara is asking Bill about the specifics of the ceremony. Bill responds with "They pronounce us husband and wife, and I become one with my undead bride." Tara gives him a skeptical look and asks, "What do you mean undead?" Bill says nothing, but turns to look at the approaching Sookie with a gleam in his eye. Tara takes off at a sprint screaming, "NO, SOOKIE! HE'S GOING TO MU'FUCKIN' KILL YOU!" Bill tries to stop her, but is body-blocked by Lafayette. Furious, he sinks his teeth into Lafayette's neck. Lafayette manages to escape and he, Tara, and Sookie struggle to jump into the car and make their escape. Bill makes it to the car, but he is sluggish and drugged up. He dazedly asks Lafayette, "What was it?" As it turns out, Bill was reacting to the drugs in Lafayette's bloodstream that Lafayette had already developed an immunity for. Tara, Sookie, and Lafayette take off in Bill's car, hysterically laughing at their luck.

They're in the car, shooting down the highway, but all of a sudden, they see a head peeking out from over the trunk. It's Sion, who is struggling to pull himself over and onto the vehicle. They scream and Tara starts to swerve from side to side to throw him off. To their horror, they discover that Sion is not, in fact, trying to pull himself onto the car, but is actually a decapitated head and hand that have been supernaturally re-animated. After much more shrieking and swerving, they are relieved to discover that what they see is actually a video game installed on Bill's car, programmed to project videos onto the back window. Trippy.

The dream then starts to get more sane and returns to first person POV.

Somehow, I end up back at the ADVENT headquarters and meet up with Priscilla. Priscilla asks me, "Didn't you want to learn how to play that Reba song? Should I go get your guitar or mine?" I must have given her a very confused expression because she answers herself and says "All right, I'll just go get mine." This is all interrupted when Daniel calls a team meeting. In real life, Daniel Chang is always the bearer of ill news...this doesn't change much in the dreamscape. Apparently, we were attempting to evangelize in Canada. However, because our stated purpose for visiting Canada was "to spread the gospel", Canada denied us entry rights into the country. The last thing I remember is asking Daniel, "Are you going to yell at us?" but, for the life of me, I cannot remember what we did to prompt such a question.

Now that I've thoroughly documented my dream, I can finally go back to sleep. In conclusion, I think I've been watching too much TV and missing ADVENT. ): Whatever, hopefully more interesting dreams will come.

Drowning My Sorrows in Pearl Tea

I have literally had a pearl tea every single day for the last two weeks. Sometimes two. OK, to be more accurate, I have had coconut jelly tea. After the first three weeks of pearls, I got sick of them. No flavor. bleh. Exchanged them for coconut jelly and aloe, which has awesome texture AND taste! Joy!

Right now, I'm sitting in Starbucks (again). This time I purchased a tall caramel machiatto that cost me more than it would have had I been in America. Balls. But it can't be helped. This morning, I dragged myself out of bed at 6:50 AM because I had to go buy bras. Yes. Bras. My uncle drove my grandmother and me to Shilin to visit the little street vendor that we've been buying bras from for the past decade. On the way there, we had a rather unnerving conversation about how I had to buy a supply of underwear that would last me through college. Yes. A conversation about bras. With my Uncle. (shudder)

After buying six bras that I do not really like, (sigh), my grandmother took me to get some bubble ice. Usually, this is a treat, but this morning I have beastly cramps. But for my dear grandmother, I ate that taro bubble ice. However, when she suggested shopping I had to put my foot down. The thought of pushing and shoving my way through the crowded alleyway, on my period, hunched over in menstrual agony, limping, sweating, urgh. Not happening. I unashamedly proclaimed that I was on my period and that I was in PAIN. My grandma laughed. Oh, grandma. How you must love me.

I have a monster cut on my toe from the sneaky sharp rocks on the beaches of Keelung. It's really starting to bother me. The sensation is not like having another pair of lips on your foot. Except every time you kiss the ground, you feel excruciating pain. I exaggerate, but unpleasant nonetheless.

Anyways, this hot coffee is doing wonders for the cramps. It's either that or the way I'm curled into the fetal position on a couch, using my computer as a heat pack. Meh, anything to make that 115NT worth it.

Taiwan Blog: 7/17 (Heh. I forgot about this one)

07/17/10

It’s been a while since I blogged last. All I can say is that things have changed a lot and for the better. It’s the end of the second week and I am now on a train heading for TaiDong. Many people are leaving for Taipei today. Among these, the most noteworthy are Andrea, my Fremont buddy, and Lester, my Xiao Pang buddy. ): I miss them a lot. I don’t know how the skit will work without Lester’s Bert laugh. D: A lot of people are gone now, and I already know I’ll be staying up very late tonight working on tomorrow’s skit. We’ll have to change it completely because of our decimated numbers. Down from 90 to around 20. One more week to go! God has been very good to me in these past two weeks. I’ve had awesome students and even more awesome fellow teachers. It’s hard to believe how alienated I felt from these people just weeks ago. Now, I endure their absence miserably. The Lins and the Liaos! Canadians are secretly awesome. Who knew? I don’t know what I’m going to do next week when ADVENT ends and we all go our separate ways. I’m going to be a wreck.