Anyways, here is a brief rundown of all the awesome things that have happened to me in the last couple weeks/months:
- Finally got the coveted white coat! My parents actually dressed up for the ceremony, and if you know my family, you know that never happens. I'm pretty sure they wore shorts to my last graduation. And of course, we celebrated afterwards by getting some quality soul food. That oxtail though! WHOOWHEE!
- Passed my first medical school exam ever. Studied way too hard. Went home the weekend after and slept for 12 hours. Med student down.
- Celebrated my 23rd birthday by telling absolutely no one in order to avoid being cornered as a crowd of people sing me the dreaded birthday song. I mean, what the hell am I supposed to do during that? Twiddle my thumbs? Cringe as people sing in approximately 20 different keys? Furthermore, do I clap with everyone when it's over? Do I say "Thank you" afterwards?? PLEASE SPARE ME THE AGONY. In typical Abby fashion, I grabbed my free birthday drink from Starbucks ($7, fuck yeah), and went to class like a good girl. Even went to the evening review session -- now that's how you treat yo'self on your birthday.
Haha just kidding, I did celebrate my birthday a little bit. My good friend Tina came up with her partner and my sister to take me out to dinner that Wednesday. We ate to the pain at Espetus (OMG, those chicken hearts though!) I would include a picture of us there, but my sister does this thing where pictures in her camera don't see the light of day for at least half a year. Sigh. Then, my parents picked me up that Friday and took me to House of Prime Rib. I got the King Henry cut, thinking it was the only one that came with the dessert slice. Not only could I have settled for the House of Prime Rib cut, but I also was never offered a dessert slice!! UGH. I couldn't have eaten a single more bit, but STILL. The principle!!
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| A formidable foe |
Honestly, med school has been a blast so far. I've met some of the most awesome and authentic people who challenge me to see from new perspectives and never settle for less than my best. Whether we're freaking out in the Anatomy lab, checking out the faculty members in Histology lab, kayaking, paddle-boarding, hitting the gym, or shamelessly inhaling free samples at Costco, I am so grateful to have these people in my life.
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| I mean, look at these goobers. Kayaking study break in the Bay! |
But let's get real for a moment here. Med school is also hard. Many people here are feeling the pressure and it just reminds me how important it is to be open and honest to your peers. When I'm struggling, I ask for help. Just as importantly, when I get it (rare as this may be), I offer to help others. That's how we stay sane around here. Someone wise once said, "Never compare your insides with somebody else's outside." This could not be more true in med school. Everyone is coming from a different background. Some have had science courses every day for the past four or five years and even continued to do research in relevant science fields for countless numbers of years after that! Others have been out of school for years, working in the real world in a field that may or not even be related to medicine or science. It's not always rainbows or butterflies, sometimes people are dicks, sometimes people get hurt, but the most important thing is that you do you, boo. Whether it's rearranging your priorities, avoiding toxic people/environments, or actively constructing a collaborative and supportive social circle, you got to do what you need to do to 1.) stay sane, 2.) be the best that you can be, and 3.) be a positive influence on those around you.
It sounds simple, but it can be so hard, especially when you're having a bad day or week. For example, a few weeks ago, I fell behind on my reading because I was having too much fun celebrating my birthday with friends and family. I skipped going to the gym that week and I cut back on sleep in order to make time to catch up. During that entire week, I was constantly tired. I felt like I couldn't concentrate or think and my eyelids would start feeling heavy whenever the lights were dimmed. By the end of the week, I just felt burnt out. I literally went home and slept for 12 hours straight. I can't imagine doing that or feeling that way every single day for any more than a week. I changed how I study, I cut back on gym time instead of cutting it out entirely, and I make sure to go to bed by midnight each night now. I feel more energized, more sharp, and most importantly, more positive about everything that I have to do.
It also helps that I am working now (a small federal work study job), which gives me a feeling of financial stability -- I can treat myself to Jamba Juice once every blue moon now with less guilt -- while also allowing me to continue pursue my other passion, teaching. It's only 4-8 hours a week, I get paid for my transportation time, and I get to work with elementary school kids to help them strengthen their reading skills (which is what I did with Americorps during my year off). It literally could not be more perfect -- God is great!
One more thing -- I'm still figuring out where I stand with God and with the church. I've visited the campus fellowship and it seems like they are a great group of people. But committing to stick around on campus on Friday nights is difficult, especially since I live so far away. Also, not having a campus church is another huge obstacle. Most of the people from the fellowship attend church in the Mission by Dolores Park and that is a 45-60 minute bus ride away for me. Seems pretty impractical. Hopefully, I will find a good church to visit in Inner Sunset for those weekends in which I stay in SF instead of traipsing home for good food and company.
So yes, it's becoming abundantly clear that medical school is going to be a looooong journey --more like four back-to-back marathons, really. But I'm excited to be here and I'm hanging in here! For now.
